You Scream, I Scream, We all Scream (while I secretly cringe)

I know it's normal for babies to cry but is it just me that gets nervous when my daughter cries in public?

I tend to be a person that overly cares what other people think...even perfect strangers. Believe me I know this is an issue I need to work on but for the foreseeable future it's a trait I'm stuck with.

That being said, whenever Sophie cries in public I feel a little bit nervous and then I feel bad for the people around me. If we go to dinner and she gets a bit fussy, I suddenly find myself signaling the waiter to back up our food to go and apologizing to the strangers around me.

Thankfully Dan is much more calm and has the common sense to realize that babies cry. It's what they do. A lot. So I need to deal with it. He's usually the one that looks at me (like the crazy person I am) and says "just give her a minute", then she stops crying once she's found her toy or found her hand to chew on, and we go back to our dinner.

Now I'm in public often (as normal non-hermit people are) and I see babies out all the time and I hear them cry or get fussy and I find it normal. I often feel sympathetic for the baby's mom who obviously is doing what she can to soothe the crying baby, so I don't know why I feel guilty when my baby cries.

Anyone else relate?

Mother's Day

So obviously I'm a little behind on this blog, but it's my goal to write more each week....let's see how I do.


May 2013 marked my very first Mother's Day and it was.......uneventful, just like I wanted it to be.

Dan and I both agreed that for mother's/father's day we didn't really want to make a big deal out of it. I'm not Dan's mom and he isn't my dad, so we didn't understand why we should have to make a big celebration for one another or get each other gifts.

Instead, we decided that when Sophie gets older if she wants to get us a gift or make us something that is fine, but neither Dan nor I need to get a gift or plan some big hoopla for the other. It just works for us that we were both on the same page.

That being said, I did have a nice Mother's Day and went to Jack London Square for a little Farmer's Market Action and a Cocktail Al Fresco (my favorite way to drink...outside in the sunshine).

Agitating Advice.....Fun Failure #3

I think so far one of the hardest things that comes along with this motherhood business is all the advice that everyone has for you. Yep...harder than the sleepless nights, endless feedings, hormones, etc is complete strangers coming up to you and giving you their two cents on how they think you should raise your child.

Don't get me wrong, I am a newbie and gratefully accept most of advice....but mostly I appreciate advice from family, friends, people I know that have had children, etc. Complete strangers is a whole other story.

It's off putting when someone you have never met and most likely won't ever see again, comes up to you to give you some not so "constructive" criticism in the disguise of advice. So far I've been told that I shouldn't take my baby out in public before they are three months old, that having an infant in a grocery store is just an invitation for germs, that you can never have too many blankets covering a baby even when it's 80 degrees outside, and many others.

Most of the time, I just smile, say thanks and let it go.

For some reason, on St. Patrick's Day I had one of my first major meltdowns, ignited by the advice of strangers.

Our neighbors are good friends of our and were playing with their band at an outside patio on St. Patricks Day. We wanted to be supportive, so we told them if Sophie was in a good mood, we'd try to drop by while they were playing for a little bit to show our support. It was a warm day, I checked with my neighbor to make sure it wouldn't be too loud for Sophie and we brought mini earphones for her to wear in case it was louder than we thought.

So we joined the green-wearing crown (it wasn't even really that crowded) and went for a bit to show our support. We were there for about 20 minutes and Sophie was asleep the entire time. We had her away from any speakers and obviously the music wasn't bothering her since she remained asleep the whole time. That however did not stop people from coming up to me telling me that babies shouldn't be anywhere so loud. Add the never ending advice to the fact that I overheard a group of people talking about me bringing a baby out and "couldn't I afford a babysitter" and you have the basis for my meltdown.


I almost started to cry right there, informed Dan that we needed to leave right then, and rushed to the car before the tears started flowing.

I can usually let these things go but for some reason on this day, at this particular moment, it really bothered me. I had a good talk with Dan and my girlfriend about it and decided that I just have to be confident that I know how to raise my own baby.

So lesson learned: people are going to have their own opinions. Some of it is helpful, some of it isn't.  I just have to roll with it and not let it bother me.